


Just Office Business

by AnneLaurant



Category: W.I.T.C.H.
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, Bad Humor, Comedy, F/M, Gen, Swearing, slice-of-life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-19
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2020-03-07 22:57:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18882946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnneLaurant/pseuds/AnneLaurant
Summary: Will Vandom yells at the CEO. Naturally, most people thinks she’s to be fired along with banning seven generations of her family from ever touching the Escanor Businesses Group, but the cunning CEO has something else in mind.Eventual PhoWill, Office AU, lots of swearing and biased commentary because it’s Will’s POV





	Just Office Business

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposedly an experimental oneshot. Supposedly. But then it had potential to be a chaptered story (probably looking into 10-15 chapters of the same length?). I wrote this for my own humor, but I hope you enjoy.

Deep breaths, Will! Everything will be okay!

So went the mantra in Will’s head. She remembers oh-so-fondly of how she just about screamed at the CEO. The CEO. Oh, yes, that was sarcasm; she was not very fond of the situation, no matter how correct she thought she was at that time.

See, the CEO of Escanor Analytics was an a-hole. He was the hole inside the “A” of “TEAM”. He was a diligent worker, probably, but he was a hard ass to his subordinates. Caleb feared his lettucey snack would shrivel in the presence of His Overlord Almighty. Taranee always asked herself why there wasn’t better employment out there. (She would go on half or full day leaves with the reason being LBM - “looking for better management”. So far she hadn’t gotten luck.)

Will felt similarly as her friends did. Secretary Cedric Hoffman called her into the directors’ lounge, and when people got called to The Lounge, it only meant two things: skyhigh promotion, or fired, fired, fired so badly, you also get to tell all your relatives in the companies, its partners, and subsidiaries that the whole tree was all fired and never to go back there again.

Maybe she should’ve applied for the front desk instead. Working alongside the very peppy Lin Hay Lin would be nice! Except Will always had a horror-worthy face, with those large eyebags, that froggy grin, and - oh, yes - the messy swamp thing hairdo!

No, no. She couldn’t lose this job. She had one last chance to beg! Surely there must be a reason why Mr. Escanor was taking this long to talk to her about… firing her. A demotion was better than being out of a job. Yes! She’ll take custodian duty!

Will tried to think. The man was an intimidating dark prince cosplayer wannabe. He often yelled at people, which meant she should be the innocent sheep servant with a pleasant little voice. She should act small, but not too small to be branded an idiot with capital I’s.

Then, the secretary stepped out the office. He glanced at his wristwatch. Will smiled at him. He sighed in response.

The clock ticked.

“I don’t know why he complicates things,” the secretary told her. His voice made Will think he was a smarty-pants. Oh, great. Well, he was supposed to be smart to match Mr. A-hole CEO’s supposed genius… “Buuut, good luck, Miss Vandom!”

“Just Will would do!” Will tried to laugh pleasantly.

“Yes. Will. Whatever.”

The secretary took his phone out, and boy, he transformed. His usually grumpy face turned into an angelic smiling prince… to an avid fan who’s had their OTP made canon.

Will squinted her eyes. She rubbed them. She saw this, all right.

“My love!” Cedric squealed. He made kissing motions towards his own phone and nuzzled it.

Ah. He was that sort of lover, huh?

“Going home, wifey! I’m coming home~” He kissed the screen. Ha, ha. “Tell the world I’m coming home~ My Ruby Kitty!”

Oh. Married. So. He was that sort of husband. Huh? He was married? He was married?! Since when? This man was a married man! This workaholic who spent all-nighters on so many projects! There was a reason everyone knew Cedric Hoffman in the office, but wow, who knew that love would seep its way into his busy life.

The peculiarity only heightened when an alarm went off. It was Cedric’s phone, and Will raised an eyebrow. There was a brief flash of panic in his eyes… but he glared. Shit. Will sank in her seat. Cedric Hoffman, the company’s most capable man (and probably its last remaining good brain cell in his tier) glaring at her.

“It’s time, Will Vandom.”

It’d come! It’d come! Judgment hour had come!

Will stood and marched towards the open door before her. The CEO’s office. Holy heck. She hadn’t even practiced her begging. The healthcare benefits! The grocery perks!

But all thought vanished as she stepped into the office.

Black. Maroon. Gothic. Vampiric.

The four concepts slammed her eyes and nose. Will shook her head. This couldn’t be right.

“Sit.”

Like she could. Will forced her eyes to gaze at the outwardly intimidating and inwardly horribly ugly CEO of Escanor Analytics.

…alright. Maybe he wasn’t that ugly… outside. But he was still pretty vampiric.

Long flaxen hair worthy of a Loreal shampoo commercial. Noble face, long with killer jaws. He could be a supernatural YA novel love interest. The goatee was nice and sexy, though, but it, along with his eyebrows and lashes, had red hairs. Will was unsure which hairs were natural.

And he was wearing black, with red lapels.

But oh, dear god, that tie! Will bit her lip when she beheld that ugly tie. Baby dragons! His tie had baby dragons in multiple colors! The tie clashed with his formal appearance!

“Did I not tell you to sit?”

“Um. Yes.”

Will took a chair–

“Amusing. You yell at me for yelling at your ingrate colleagues. Now, you disobey my command in silence.”

“Uh. Yes. I did that.”

“Very amusing. Very.”

Any time now! Will was more than ready to throw herself on the wine red carpet floor. This was taking too long. She needed to talk about a reassignment–

“It’s a quality I like in my assistants. Alright. I see now. You’re to clean your cubicle today, and tomorrow you start working in here.”

…what? Wait. What’s going on here?!

“I admit, Miss Vandom. I have… flaws. And I’d like you to help me manage them, as well as my schedules.”

Like, like secretary work?! “You already have Mr. Hoffman, Sir!”

“He has his strengths, but ah, he falls sort when it comes to more personal affairs.”

Like, that display earlier?

“He turns into an idiot when he receives any sort of message from his girlfriend… well, now his wife. He recently got married.” The CEO sighed and massaged his temples. “And things will surely get worse when his wife gets pregnant and the baby comes. He’s, he’s wonderful, don’t get me wrong. He’s an extremely capable secretary, but god, he loses all his grandeur when it comes to that love of his life, light of his world bullshit!”

Will had way too little time to process all these. She needed space. Now.

“…if that’s understood, Miss Vandom, please. Pack your things and move.”

The next thing Will realized was how shit she looked like in the restroom mirror. Shit. The CEO was a dude with a gothic desk and an antique dragon lamp, dressed as if he was the heir to some dark manor in Vampireland, and he basically asked her to be his secretary after she yelled at him at the top of her lungs.

“What. The. Fuck?!”

From being fired, to being possibly only demoted, to being… promoted. Will Vandom, personal manager (secretary) to the CEO of Escanor Analytics, Philip “Phobos” Escanor.

What in the name of the office just went wrong there?!


End file.
